Various Thoughts

As a leader of a writer's group I place a great emphasis on productivity. Between November and January I had a spate of inspiration whilst in recent months my creative 'muse' appears to have run dry. One factor is that I was being influenced over the productive period by the desire to write. I don't currently have the desire. I am wondering whether I should force or push myself or alternatively run with my inclination. When I write things and sometimes even when I merely speak, words appear to emerge that are beyond what I feel that I could put together on the basis of my own abilities and experiences. It appears as if something else kicks in. Some things I attempt struggle to get off the ground whether other things fly and glide with grace.

I continually feel that I am pursuing something delicate on the perifery of my vision and if I try too hard I will somehow negate it. I am also not sure what kind of judge I am of my own output. Sometimes I write and say something that I find distinctly mediocre and people react by saying how wonderful it was. Uplifted and encouraged I write the same thing again only to be met with a stony silence. Somebody once said that perseverence is the key to life. Well it is certainly important together with a strong sense of self respect. Not to be ruled by the opinions of others. Sometimes you will be loved, sometimes hated, sometimes laughed at, sometimes ignored, sometimes applauded. Often a person's reaction will say more about that other person than you.